A simple but powerful exercise on empathy and perspective-taking is to ask your participants to write a short essay about a recent conflict they were in where they felt they were in the right and the other person was in the wrong, regardless of who started the argument. Ask them to recall as vividly as possible, what happened in the situation, including defending your position that you were right.
After they complete the short essay, ask them to now write about the same conflict but recount the incident as accurately as possible from the first-person perspective of the person they were in conflict with. Literally, put yourself in their shoes, mind frame, and perspective to vividly describe before, during and after the situation, including defending their position that they were right.
This exercise was mention in this Hidden Brain Episode, Hidden Brain: US 2.0: Win Hearts, Then Minds on Apple Podcasts with Robb Willer. He talks about it around minute 8.
Around the 24-30 minute mark there were a few highlights:
- His goal wasn't to win a debate but to change somebody's behavior
- You should be less interested in the motivations and the reasons people have for change and be more interested in the end goal
- We are not just trying to have them come over to our point of view for our reasons but by meeting the individual where they are and paying them respect for what they believe, helps them change their mind (and behavior) for their reasoning
- His job to try and persuade someone wasn't to marshall all the arguments at his disposal. It was to find some way to make connections with the other person. (Using empathy and perspective taking to find common ground)
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